you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
