I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
