Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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