I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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