i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Randomize
