i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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