Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
