This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
How's work?
Spinning.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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