I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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