I seem to have left my pride at pride
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
You brought string cheese to the strip club
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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