How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
