We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize
