just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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