i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
