dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Where is the hickey?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
