You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
