You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
