we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
