i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
