Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
