ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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