I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
You ate ashes out of my bong
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
