I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
