Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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