can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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