Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
