I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
