I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
