Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
