Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
foreskin is a definite game changer
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
