didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
