went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
