He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
