Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
