So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Man, jail baloney is awful.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
