Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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