was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize