I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
