It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Is it because I queefed?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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