Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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