did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I want to fling myself into the sun
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