I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
