All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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