and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
