Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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