Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
