the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
