I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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