Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
