wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
